


"that's me flirting"

by bisexualbarry



Category: Arrow (TV 2012), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, OOC-ness, Texting, uhh that's literally it
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-30
Updated: 2018-08-07
Packaged: 2019-06-19 04:12:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15502059
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bisexualbarry/pseuds/bisexualbarry
Summary: Barry:im a power bottomOliver:you're just a bottomBarry:I used to thinkOliver:S U BBarry:i could topOliver:id eat you (((((((((;Barry:yeahBarry:SHSSJBarry:Day one billion without sex:





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this is literally the most pointless thing ive ever posted, but it's funny, so
> 
> these texts are actual texts between my friend steph and i. we're not actually dating, but some of our texts are sketchy, smh
> 
>  **disclaimer:** im not actually oliver (sad), and steph isnt actually barry (sad part two), so ofc they'll be ooc

**Oliver:** what's with you and T names

 **Barry:** T names are the best

 **Oliver:** your name starts with an B

 **Barry:** yeah  
**Barry:** but the fourth letter is  
**Barry:** T  
**Barry:** ((;  
**Barry:** barTholomew

 **Oliver:** i don't have a T anywhere in my name

 **Barry:** intellectuals only  
**Barry:** yeah its ugly  
**Barry:** tollie

 **Oliver:** oof

 **Barry:** there its beautiful now

 **Oliver:** ew no

 **Barry:** Tollie  
**Barry:** yes

 **Oliver:** the T is silent

 **Barry:** ollie u almost made me spit out my drink

 **Oliver:** good

 **Barry:** i had to pay an extra 3 dollars for it  
**Barry:** not its not good

 **Oliver:** dvekdj

 **Barry:** ihop is expensive

 **Oliver:** don't spit out your drink

 **Barry:** #richpeopleculture  
**Barry:** i swallowed, don't worry

 **Oliver:** that's hot  
**Oliver:** if it makes you feel any better, ive spit out my drink before  
**Oliver:** it went all over the table

 **Barry:** sTOPDJDJDJJD  
**Barry:** ollie i almost did it again

 **Oliver:** (:

 **Barry:** im gonna have to stop talking to you

 **Oliver:** ):

—

 **Barry:** im a power bottom

 **Oliver:** you're just a bottom

 **Barry:** I used to think

 **Oliver:** S U B

 **Barry:** i could top

 **Oliver:** id eat you (((((((((;

 **Barry:** yeah  
**Barry:** SHSSJ  
**Barry:** Day one billion without sex:

—

 **Barry:** ollie bby  
**Barry:** im gonna be busy with no internet all day  
**Barry:** so  
**Barry:** well probably not all day  
**Barry:** but idk  
**Barry:** just in case

 **Oliver:** no ))):

 **Barry:** so u know  
**Barry:** )):  
**Barry:** i love u

 **Oliver:** i love you, more  
**Oliver:** i miss you already

 **Barry:** i miss u more  
**Barry:** wow, we sound like a gross clingy couple

 **Oliver:** i was just thinking that  
**Oliver:** LOL

—

 **Oliver:** [sends picture]  
**Oliver:** isn't he the cutest kid

 **Barry:** he's ur nephew right?

 **Oliver:** yes  
**Oliver:** no, he's my grandson

 **Barry:** lil james  
**Barry:** STOPDBDN  
**Barry:** ):  
**Barry:** he's really cute

 **Oliver:** ISNT HE

 **Barry:** ur daughter or son made a really cute baby  
**Barry:** makes me wanna have one

 **Oliver:** when i first saw him on saturday, he couldn't stop hugging me even though i only saw him the day before

 **Barry:** come make one with me((;  
**Barry:** aWW

 **Oliver:** okay ((((;

 **Barry:** just kidding  
**Barry:** itd come out ugly

 **Oliver:** two ugly people usually make cute kids  
**Oliver:** so if you're saying it'll come out ugly  
**Oliver:** then we both cute as hell

 **Barry:** JSJ  
**Barry:** Ollie what kind of logic is that tf

 **Oliver:** everybody says that

 **Barry:** um no offense but my dad wasn't cute

 **Oliver:** EVEKDK

 **Barry:** my mom was

 **Oliver:** that's the oddest sentence ive ever read  
**Oliver:** "my dad wasn't cute"

 **Barry:** NDJDJDJJD  
**Barry:** i dont wanna be disrespectful and say he ugly  
**Barry:** but ///:

—

 **Barry:** [sends picture]  
**Barry:** ima get one for us  
**Barry:** idc

 **Oliver:** i want the blue one

 **Barry:** i wanted the blue):

 **Oliver:** mine, butch  
**Oliver:** *bitch

 **Barry:** wait, I'll actually google them hold up

 **Oliver:** LMAO

 **Barry:** no bitch  
**Barry:** wHAT ARE U LAUGJING ABOUT  
**Barry:** Is it too clingy

 **Oliver:** no, it's cute

 **Barry:** theyre around 75-170 dollars  
**Barry:** BUT

 **Oliver:** rip

 **Barry:** The good news is  
**Barry:** theyre both blue! ;D

 **Oliver:** not for that price

 **Barry:** OMG  
**Barry:** WHAT IF WE GET ONE  
**Barry:** IN A DILDO SHAPE  
**Barry:** OMG NO

 **Oliver:** NO

 **Barry:** A HEART SHAPE UWU

 **Oliver:** how do you go from dick to heart

 **Barry:** A SCULPTURE OF MY FACE  
**Barry:** AND URS  
**Barry:** SO EVERY MORNING

 **Oliver:** ew no

 **Barry:** YOUD WAKE UP  
**Barry:** AND SCREAM  
**Barry:** (;

 **Oliver:** stop, omg


	2. Chapter 2

**Barry:** I'm sucking on apple sauce and I almost moaned

 **Oliver:** um  
 **Oliver:** save some for later (;

 **Barry:** Bc of how delicious the apple sauce is of course  
 **Barry:** Apple sauce?

 **Oliver:** oh ofc  
 **Oliver:** no, the sucking  
 **Oliver:** dumbass

 **Barry:** NDJDHDHDD

 **Oliver:** im trying to flirt with you

 **Barry:** There's always some sucking left for u (((;  
 **Barry:** Oh

 **Oliver:** but you're too dumb to understand

 **Barry:** It's been so long since you flirted with me  
 **Barry:** I had forgotten what it looked like

 **Oliver:** i flirt with you all the time, you're just slow on the update  
 **Oliver:** UPTAKE

 **Barry:** All u do is call me ugly and dumb

 **Oliver:** that's me flirting

—

 **Oliver:** sight  
 **Oliver:** *aigh  
 **Oliver:** **sigh  
 **Oliver:** oh deck me  
 **Oliver:** FUCJ  
 **Oliver:** i give up

 **Barry:** DJJDJDJSJD  
 **Barry:** UR SONCUTE

—

 **Barry:** I lost my video chat virginity  
 **Barry:** I've been super self conscious since  
 **Barry:** And insecure and soft,,,,,  
 **Barry:** Today I'm rlly soft  
 **Barry:** And sensitive

 **Oliver:** you're always soft

 **Barry:** I knew you'd say that shit  
 **Barry:** But that's aLIE

 **Oliver:** it's not alie, it's atruth

—

 **Barry:** How the fuck was I supposed to know who Bon Jovi is  
 **Barry:** I'm not 80 years old

 **Oliver:** IT'S A CLASSIC

 **Barry:** I've never heard of it  
 **Barry:** I'm not emo

 **Oliver:** you're fired as a friend

 **Barry:** Was I ever even hired

 **Oliver:** yes  
 **Oliver:** _i would've died for you_  
 **Oliver:** now?  
 **Oliver:** croak, bitch xx

 **Barry:** What does croak mean  
 **Barry:** Like isn't that what frogs do

 **Oliver:** it means die bitch

 **Barry:** No it doesn't

 **Oliver:** yes it does

 **Barry:** You'd die without me  
 **Barry:** I'm like your oxygen

 **Oliver:** id die _because of you_

 **Barry:** I'm ur shore to ur beach  
 **Barry:** I think that's how it goes  
 **Barry:** Anyway  
 **Barry:** You'd die without me

 **Oliver:** there are rocky beaches

 **Barry:** It's a fact  
 **Barry:** Yeah well I'm ur rock then

 **Oliver:** that's gay

 **Barry:** Easy  
 **Barry:** I'm ur organs  
 **Barry:** Without me  
 **Barry:** U can't live  
 **Barry:** Ur gay

 **Oliver:** bear, stop, smells  
 **Oliver:** i meant  
 **Oliver:** *shskdk

 **Barry:** Smells cncjjdjdjd  
 **Barry:** ur such a loser  
 **Barry:** Y-yikes  
 **Barry:** OLLIE  
 **Barry:** anyway

 **Oliver:** i know you are, but what am i

 **Barry:** Wtf  
 **Barry:** I'm a winner  
 **Barry:** Not a loser

 **Oliver:** chicken dinner

 **Barry:** That didn't even rhyme  
 **Barry:** More proof that ur a loser

 **Oliver:** -.-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this doesn't really have a plot, just steph and i being stupid

**Author's Note:**

> kudos and comments are much appreciated!
> 
>  
> 
> [my tumblr](http://lovelylerman.tumblr.com)  
> [my instagram](http://instagram.com/blosshom)


End file.
